Gym Time

   As I sat/stood on my spin bike today trying not to think about the burning in my legs, lungs, and buns and more so on trying to breathe, I found myself looking about at the other people in the class. It occured to me that most of them were in great shape. My instructor kept yelling "Faster!!" but I ignored her since my resistance was already turned all the way up to a 10, and looked out the windowed room to the other people lifting weights and such in the main gym. Why would people who were already in shape WILLINGLY submit themselves to this pain and affliction AND pay for it?? Why were they there? One look at me and it makes sense why I'm there, but them?  As we were instructed to sit and pedal fast at a six for fourty seconds, I began pondering on motivations. For me, the gym is a good motivator because as a fat kid because I see those kinds of skinny people as my motivation. I also don't want to waste my money, so I go pretty faithfully because I am that cheap. I want it to really equal out being a dollar a day for $30ish dollars a month. As we began doing jumps, it hit me that maybe these people weren't really in shape at all! That just because on the outside they appeared to be thin and in good shape, maybe their bodies were God given, and that they had to work just as hard as I did to be in good health and shape. I looked more closely at some of the people and saw quite a few looking in a worse condition then I was.  I realized that just as many people had looked, and probably still do, look at me and think "Fat kid, can't do squat" (no pun intended), I had been looking at them wrongly too. Yeah, I still hate them for their natural body luck nonetheless.
  Although I didn't want to think about what they thought about me, I started thinking about my life pre-gym. Before this faithful gym attendance, I'd always actively participated in sports, starting with ballet all the way to its opposite, rugby. I've always enjoyed hiking and biking and all that outdoorsy type of activity. I've always tended to surprise people with my athleticism. I remember in what I think was my freshmen year, or at some point in high school, we had some kind of contest involving a 4x4 around the track. I remember I was the last person to run the last 100 meters. I took that baton from my last teammate and proceeded to SMOKE the rest of the skinny fast kids. What I remember most was the shocked looks and dropped jaws as I crossed that finish line. I'm sure they were all thinking, how did she just move all of THAT body mass that fast? I also remember beating my teammates up and down the court so many times that it shocked even my coach. I still remember to this day her eyes getting really big as I sprinted with her down the court for a fast break lay up while everyone else walked and gulped for air. She smiled a HUGE smile and said, "Wow Emma, I'm so impressed!" Yeah, I'm Scottish and Filipino folks. Stamina + fast little people genes. Shouldn't shock anybody :)       
    Anyway, I digress. For fat kids like me, it made sense in my head to originally think them ridiculous and maybe shallow, motivated by people checking them out n such - you know those types. Turning the gym into a bloody meat market. As the spin lady announced we ONLY had four more songs left, I came to a new conclusion. When I've reached my "happy place" and permanently kicked my fat kid to the curb, you will find me nowhere NEAR a gym. I'm looking forward to staying in shape through my love of sports and outdoors and leaving the gym pressure behind. This sister will not be anywhere near a gym, nor paying monthly to be around a whole bunch of sweaty people. I wish them all the best of luck in their happy places too. And I hope that all of us never judge anyone's athetliticsm by their "book cover" of their bodies, too. Happy workin' it!